Winter is a difficult season
Seasonal depression isn't anything like clinical depression, but I feel more anxious and susceptible to it during the winter. Life can be precarious, and the cold, darkness and rain outside is a reminder of what's on the other side of that precariousness.
So, I can appreciate why pagans will celebrate Christmas as the beginning of a new cycle of life and rebirth - or at least the early and eager expectation of it. For us Catholics, that time is the beginning of Lent, which happens to be the 40 day period of transition between the long period of shite weather and summer.
And, for us Catholics, Christmas, which doesn't officially begin until 25th December, is a time when we celebrate and reflect on the profound moment in history when God came to be with humankind.
By accident, rather than design, and largely because it's become heavily commercialised, Christmas also became a period for appreciating the heavy burden that comes with loving one another and with being painfully aware of the situations of the less fortunate. More truthfully, it's the heavy burden of trying to express that love in heavily materialist ways, and trying to reconcile that with the fact many have nothing.
The first problem is the advertising. I never used to watch TV much before meeting my boyfriend. These days I'm subjected to the fifteen minute barrages of adverts that constantly interrupt the stuff we actually want to watch. The Christmas adverts start up long before Christmas, telling everyone what we should be buying.
Consequently, everywhere we go, we're caught in the rush of people frantically buying as much shit as they can, trying to meet the expectations of what they should be buying. And I feel that pressure to buy the best shit I can think of, for a dozen people, and I literally have no idea what. I can only go from store to store, picking up things I think others would like.
What could I do for the less fortunate, for those who don't have anyone or anything? A few years ago, I used to work at the Night Shelters, did what I could as a Street Pastor and had a fraternity to help my efforts. These days, being ostracised by much of the Church, and without a ministry, my options are limited to the occasional show of charity on the street. It's nowhere near enough to help anyone in a tangible way.